The Joys of Upperclassmen

Things I have learned in college:

P Safe (public safety) will never bust bonfires in the woods because they would have to leave their golf carts by the lake and people have and will push them in.

They lied when they said this wasn’t a smoker friendly campus.

The best place to hide a stash (if you happen to have one) is on top of the light fixtures.

There’s one waitress on night shift at the diner. She works every night. Her name is Phil.

Athletes (with the exception of rugby players) and everyone else don’t get along.

This is not confirmed, but at some point in their career Rugby players are encouraged, not forced, to get branded.

1972 is more than just a year.

Don’t buy cigarettes from Harris Teeter.

Carry your beer in a backpack.

Happy sex is highly encouraged.

Needless to say, I’m thoroughly enjoying myself. Especially since Roomie-Dearest went to high school with an upperclassman, Cesar, and he’s since introduced us to a bunch of other upperclassmen, including GoodMan** and The Minimalist*. We went over to their apartment last night with the intention of just baking cookies, which we did, but then we stayed and bonded with the lovely boys until 3am. At one point, Cesar was sleeping in his closet. He deemed it comfortable.

Things ended with Sweet-n-Slow, which I’m happy about. We’re friends, but I decided to get the hell out of dodge when he came into my room, kicked Roomie-Dearest out and then proceeded to confess that he cuddled with another girl the other night because he thought I was ignoring him, but don’t worry! He was thinking about me the whole time. Nice of him to confess like that, but monogamy is the last thing on my college to-do list (yes, I have one and its growing by the day). Hell, it’s the last thing on any of my to-do lists. Especially after I’ve been in college for all of 5 days.

Oh, and then there’s classes. They started today (at 8fucking30 in the morning). Nothing too terribly eventful on that front, but it is nice to have somewhere I have to be. It keeps me focused.

Now I’m off to lunch in the caf (saying that made me cringe a bit) and to find out where I pick up my packages.

*The Minimalist-one of Cesar’s room mates. He’s from Vermont and was a sous chef for 3 years. We’re going to play Iron Chef one night. He reminds me, in a good way, of an ex-boyfriend. I’ve got a wee bit of a crush on him, but not a little girl crush. More, I would just like to get to know him.

**GoodMan-the boy Roomie-Dearest has a crush on. He rarely wears a shirt while partying, has a lip ring and a tattoo, and is a genuinely nice guy.